There’s a book out there entitled A Long Obedience in the Same Direction. I’ve never read this book because the title alone scares me to death. I’m not so good with patience…or boredom…or doing the same thing every day. I pretty much HAVE to have something to look forward to or I start feeling antsy and going a little bit crazy.
The last eight years of my life have been nothing but constant change—jobs, cities, places to live. Now I find myself in a “situation” that could realistically not change for awhile. Oh, I’m sure that I’ll probably move to a different apartment or house at some time in the next year or so because that just seems to be my lot in life (one benefit: I am the most efficient packer EVER and I accumulate very little stuff). But I’m at a stable job that I’m not looking to get out of, in a city that I really don’t see myself leaving anytime soon.
I know that God could totally change all of that without a moment’s notice, but what if He doesn’t? I’ve learned so much over the last decade about how to deal with change, but very little about how to deal with sameness. I think I’ve had my fair share of heartache and struggle this year, but I have to admit that it’s easier to cry out to God when I can really feel my desperate need for Him.
It’s a lot harder when there is an established rhythm to life and nothing seems all that difficult. I find myself a little bit envious of my friend who is living in India or other people I know who are preparing to move to different countries.
I trust that the “boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places,” but will I be able to continue to believe that even if instead of calling me to go, God calls me to stay? The sufficiency of God’s grace seems much more real to me in times of struggle and weakness than it does in the small, mundane stresses of everyday life.
Most of the last 5 years of my life, God has been teaching me to trust in truth, not in my own feelings. Perhaps this season of life is just a continuation of that. Or perhaps He’s up to something bigger (He usually is) than I can even dream of.
Either way, subjects for blogging are more difficult to find J