Monday, February 13, 2012

I Have Lost my Inspiration

There is no longer anything that I’m dying to write about.  I keep starting posts and never finishing them and then erasing them because I don’t really like them.  There are a million things on my mind these days, but I can’t seem to synthesize my thoughts into anything coherent.  In case you’re wondering, a few of things include my upcoming vacation to Italy, the iPhone I’m FINALLY getting this week (yes, welcome to this decade, Emily), buying a house (which I’m planning on doing later this year), and wondering how I’m going to survive living with my parents for a few months in order to save up money for a house house.  There are also larger issues on my mind such as racial reconciliation, how God may be calling me to serve my city, what the role of women is and should be in the church, and how the church can better serve those of us who didn’t get married by the time we were 25.  But other writers have written eloquently on all of those subjects. 

So my mind is a jumbled mess, but I don’t particularly want to write about any of it.  The culprit?  I have a sneaking suspicion it might just be contentment. 

Writing for me has always been a form of catharsis, a way of ridding myself of dark thoughts and plumbing the scary depths of my heart in a safe way that brings me back to Truth.  There are some ongoing frustrations in my life to be sure, but overall, I’m pretty happy.  That could change at any time (a thought that doesn’t exactly give me warm fuzzies), but for right now, I’m trying to find some new inspiration…